Yours to Hold
by Ilandere Okami
Summary: While L tried improving himself, Light had been slowly deteriorating. That wasn’t fair; maybe Kira deserved all this, but he died years ago. This was Light, not Kira. L and Light meet up years after Light's "death" and one thing leads to another. LEMONS!


**_Edit: ((I write the author's notes to my one-shots in the actual document, but this added on )) I can't take it anymore. I've had this written for at least a week, having trouble writing after this. So this apparently is going to be a two-shot. Please don't be upset. It'll hold as much story and smut as my others. Okay, maybe a little less smut...idk yet, okay? Just be happy w/ what you have so far, which is pretty much them meeting and getting to know each other. The next part is their adventures and whatnot and THE AWESOMEST ENDING IN THE WORLD!! Also, the year is 2013 and Light is 24 and L is 34._**

**Author's note: What's that? Yeah, uh huh: another L/Light one-shot. The third in my series of one-shots. The summary is a little…different from what I normally have, I know.**

**Anyways, this one I came up with when thinking about some Matt/Mello stories I've read. I LUV reading other stories where L and/or Light get totally drunk in one-shots. They are just too good! So this one they meet up in a bar, but with unexpected circumstances and consequences. Takes place after all of DN obviously. Remember: L and Light are both said to be dead. They are actually dead in another of my one-shots…so…teehee! And everyone LUVS L seme, so HA to Light! And yes, I'm trying the "kun" thing in the story. Just L saying it though… (Old habits die hard, ya know?)**

**Oh, and this is a lot more dramatic than my other one-shots. However, I just LUV the ending!! You'll see….**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note. Duh, if I did, there would be a lot more fanservice. Nor do I own "Yours to Hold" by Skillet, the best band in the world next to Linkin Park. Almost named this "Shine" by Hilary Duff (DON'T JUDGE ME!) but this one is slightly better. "Shine" is L to Light and "Yours to Hold" is Light to L. Okay, just read.**

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Yours to Hold

There was a man sitting at the bar in a nightclub, obviously drunk. He had disheveled brown hair and glazed sepia eyes. He wore a wrinkled brown suit; the tie he wore some could swear they could see blood on. The man, who also greatly needed a shave soon, obviously didn't care. There was, however, a time when he cared very much about his appearance. That was long ago, and he was cured of that concern years before.

This man was Light Yagami, aka Kira. Nobody around him knew his name or his old identity. In fact, he went by Ryuzaki now, in memory of one of those who had died for him to be god, which never actually happened, sadly. No, he was defeated. Somehow he convinced Ryuk, the shinigami who started this all, not to kill him, but also let him keep his memories. That old death note had been thrown into a river soon after Light recovered from his gun-shot wounds.

He had nothing left anymore. His dad was dead, his sister was unresponsive, and his mom thought he was dead, not to mention his wife had killed herself after his supposed "death." He in fact faked that. Light was very much alive, but nobody on earth knew that.

That is, except for one man. And this man just happened to walk into the same nightclub Light currently was. This man had known Light when he still was Kira, when he lost his memories, and when he regained them once more, ultimately leading to the death of the World's Greatest Detective, L. And this man was L himself. However, he too went by the name Ryuzaki, in hopes he would attract Light's attention if they were ever to meet.

L faked his death as well as Light, but much more dramatically, and with witnesses, including Light himself, who had held the supposedly dead man in his arms as he "died." This man ran away to the United States, for Watari truly had been killed by that shinigami. Light had also fled to America in hopes of starting a new life away from Japan, where there was a chance someone would recognize him. And that is how they came to be in the same Chicago nightclub.

A man with slicked back black hair, black long-sleeved shirt, and baggy jeans, walked over to the bar to sit a few feet away from the drunken suit-clad man. He suspected the brunette had had a tough day at work and wanted a drink to end his day. The truth was that Light was laid off a few weeks back—again—and had spent the day trying to get another job. The raven-haired man's almost-black eyes (which had bags under them from his insomnia) darted about the club.

When the bartender came over, L ordered a drink. "I think I need to see an ID first…" came the female's reply. She was trying to hit on the obviously hot man, but to no avail. L flashed his ID at the woman and her eyes widened. "You have the same name as that guy over there," she said, nodding her head towards the drunken man. It was quite a surprise, for it was not a common American name. She then went to work getting L's drink ready.

L's eyes watched the brunette man for a few minutes until his drink came. After handing him the drink, the bartender walked over to the man with the same name as L's and tried flirting with him. She got nothing from him as well and went to fetch him another drink. When he had looked up to give her his order, L caught a glimpse of the man's sepia eyes.

No, it couldn't be possible. Well, he was using Ryuzaki as his name as well, but he didn't look too Japanese. There was only one option, and one look at those eyes confirmed L's theory. He stood and walked over to Light, sitting down on the stool next to the younger man. Yes, he looked so much like the teenager he had known, but somehow older and a lot scragglier.

"Hello," L voiced in his usual monotone. Then he realized something: Light would probably not recognize him. After all, he didn't have his normal clothes, posture, or hair. He had started wearing a black shirt to symbolize he was supposed to be dead, and slicked back his hair to change his appearance so he wouldn't be recognized. He also wanted to look nice if there was ever the infinitely small chance he would come across the very man sitting next to him.

Light looked up. Something sparked in his hazed mind. No, it couldn't be. The man that had come to sit next to him looked oddly familiar. He had the same eyes, the same bags underneath, the same colored hair, the same lips. But his skin was not as pale, his hair was slicked back, he was sitting like a normal person, and his shirt was black.

Nevertheless, nine years was ample time for someone to change. L was thinking the same thing. They hadn't seen each other in almost a decade, yet both could remember exactly how the other looked from their last day together.

L smiled and held out a hand for Light to shake. "I'm Ryuzaki," he said.

"I-impossible!" Light responded as he pulled his hand back in shock. "But m-my name's that…" he slurred.

A chuckle escaped L as he said, "Now, now Mr. Yagami, no need to be so slow tonight of all nights." He snickered once more as Light's eyes widened and he jumped slightly at the sound of his true last name. While Light was still trying to process the words through his intoxicated mind, L waved the bartender over and handed her his credit card. "I'll be taking his tab too," he said. After all, he was quite successful nowadays. Light on the other hand, did not look to be so well financially.

"Wait, where are w-we going, L?" Light said as the other man pulled him away from the bar and out of the nightclub. He had pieced it together somehow in his garbled up brain. This was somehow L, or at least a dream of him. Yeah, he thought this was all some stupid alcohol-induced dream, or perhaps a nightmare.

He wanted his old L back. The one with the messy hair and odd quirks. This one seemed darker, more serious. And he never knew L to drink anything but tea. And yes, he wanted L back. He missed the man. After he fled from Japan, all Light could think about was L, now that he actually had the time and no reason to think badly of him.

And it was in these past three years that he realized his love for the panda-like man.

L grinned. "I'm glad you put the pieces together, Light. And we are going to my home: the penthouse of Trump Tower. Thank G-d for Swiss bank accounts." By now, they were at L's car—a black Porsche. He pushed Light into the passenger seat and buckled him in before climbing in himself.

Light took a look around. "What's with you and…black? I thought you…were obsessed with…white or something…" he slurred. L could tell he was getting tired.

The driver sighed as the pulled out onto the road and started driving to his home. "I'm supposed to be dead, aren't I? I can't surround myself with white, with light, if I shouldn't be able to have it." He hoped Light understood the hidden meaning, but the drinks from earlier had hindered his thinking ability and he just leaned back in the seat and fell asleep.

The rest of the car ride was silent. L wouldn't touch the radio, too intoxicated by the mere presence of Light to disturb him. He had missed Light greatly, hating that he had to fake his death to get away from the killer. Over the time he was chained to his suspect, he had grown to love the man. He often didn't work, but watched Light as he slept during the night. He was always so peaceful and innocent during sleep.

Now L was hoping that because the whole Kira case was behind them and they both legally were dead, they could start the relationship that had started to bubble up nine years ago. The only thought going through L's mind as he picked up Light bridal style and carried him into the building, heading towards the elevator and up to his penthouse, was of Light sleeping. But not just sleeping, but sleeping next to him, in his arms.

He carefully laid Light down on the single king-sized bed in his bedroom—never been used. He then changed his own clothes but left the other man alone—besides taking off the suit jacket—thinking Light wouldn't want him to strip him if he was unconscious. He then climbed into the bed next to Light and proceeded to wrap his arms around the younger man.

He couldn't understand why he was thinking so rashly, why he was doing all this. All he knew was that he loved Light and wanted to make Light love him back. That was clouding over his sense of judgment. That, and the fact that he hadn't sat in his old way that enhanced his thinking abilities by forty percent in five years.

He just laid there and watched Light sleep for a long time. At some point, he fell asleep—a rarity for him. But this was just too comfy and too relaxing not to fall asleep. In any case, he was happier than he had been in years.

Light woke up the next morning with a killer headache. He didn't remember coming home, just a car ride. Maybe someone recognized him and had taken him home. Yeah, he had the vague memory of meeting someone he knew, a long lost friend or something. All he knew now was that he was comfortably lying in bed…with someone's arms wrapped around him.

"Oh, shit!" he exclaimed and sat up in the bed, pushing the arms off of him. He turned to the man who had started to wake up, yelling, "I'm sorry, but whatever happened last night between us, it wasn't real. I'm sorry, I was drunk. Really, I'm sorry, I love someone else. It was just a one-night stand." He didn't realize he was fully clothed yet.

L smirked. This was an interesting situation he did not predict. He thought that Light would wake up and look over at L sweetly, saying "Good morning" or something and they would live happily ever after. However, there was a chance that he did not want to wake up in another man's arms and would instead yell at the top of lungs about how this was all an accident and he was not gay. Either way, he didn't think Light would normally get drunk and in these situations.

Light continued babbling, "Listen, I'll just get dressed and leave, okay? Really, I'm sorry. I hate when this happens…" He hopped from the bed to find that his clothes were still on his body. He looked suspiciously at the man on the bed, still too flustered to realize who he was. "What…_did_ happen?" he asked as he took in the bedroom he was in.

It was plain looking, yet extravagant and expensive looking at the same time. The walls were cream colored and the furniture was elegant red wood. The sheets on the bed he had just been sleeping in were black, and something flickered in his memory. A black car…a man with black hair and a black shirt…the same man he was talking to.

The man was still lying on the bed. He looked oddly familiar, but Light couldn't place it. He couldn't be Matsuda. No, he was sent to a mental hospital soon after almost killing Light. Not Mikami, damn that pen. Who else did he know…?

"So this happens often, Light?" the man asked. How did he know his name?! Even when drunk, he never gave out his real name! Light's eyes started bugging out of their sockets. "Light-kun, is something wrong?" the raven-haired man asked. That sparked something.

"L!" Light shouted. He knew that voice, and his name spoken in that voice, too well. Half his mind wanted to pounce at the older man—to do what…well, there were two options—and the other wanted to run away in terror. L was supposed to be dead. Hell, Light was supposed to be dead!

L smirked once more. "Yes, I'm very aware of my name, Light-kun. But in America, I go by Ryuzaki…apparently you do too, if your words last night were correct. However, Light-kun didn't answer my question: This happens often?" L was actually a little worried about the answer.

A blush crossed Light's face and he answered sheepishly, "I get drunk a little too often. And I guess I'm quite attractive…So, yeah, I've woken up loads of times in strange women's and men's beds before. Some have woken up in mine of course."

L had cocked his head at this information. Light often got drunk and had sex with strange people? And he didn't even have a preference for gender. "What happened, Light?"

Light plopped down on the edge of the bed with a sigh. His eyes started to water slightly. He hated thinking about the past. And it was just so hard to think about his future now. And his present was horrible. Sometimes he wished that he really should've let Ryuk kill him. Now he didn't have the guts to take care of himself.

"I have nothing," he breathed, as if that covered everything. And it did. His apartment was about to be taken away from him, for he couldn't pay the rent, and he barely had any clothes. Food was so scarce he usually went for a week on one can of soup for dinner and just coffee for breakfast. He didn't have enough money for anything, and he had no family. What else was there?

"So you solve your problems by getting drunk and having sex with random equally drunk strangers?" L asked with acid in his voice. So while he tried improving himself, Light had been slowly deteriorating? That wasn't fair; maybe Kira deserved all this, but he died years ago. This was Light, not Kira.

"Well, we can't all be super famous, super rich detectives who can fake their own deaths and still keep all their money! No, some of us have to run away and try to start over with absolutely nothing! How I've survived this long, I'll never know. But now that I know you're really alive, my resolution is final. And we shall never see each other again," Light spat. He walked towards the window, where he looked down. "Where are we, the penthouse of some skyscraper?"

"Trump Tower, actually," L said, mildly curious at the question.

Light snorted and opened the window wide. He was about to put one foot on the ledge when L realized what he was doing and shot from the bed and rushed to the window, pulling Light by the waist to the floor.

From underneath the suicidal man, L shouted, "What do you think you're doing, Yagami-kun?!" He wouldn't let go from Light's waist, no matter how much he squirmed and tried to break free. "Do you ever think about the consequences?! Some people don't want you dead, and if they knew you were alive would do everything in their power to make sure you stayed alive!" He was shocked by his last comment.

Light, however, was still shocked by his actions. Had he really just tried killing himself? In front of the man he loved? Why? Well, maybe he realized that it was near impossible for L to love him back and just wanted to get rid of the pain before the other could reject him further. Or maybe he just couldn't handle it anymore. How could L still be living in luxury when he was about to become a beggar?

Suddenly, Light froze as L's words reached his mind. L had just saved him from killing himself and then said that there were some people that would do anything to make sure he wouldn't kill himself. Was L talking about himself? But that would mean that he cared for him…

"L…" Light started, still frozen atop the older man, "Why did you take me to your home last night?"

The retired detective sat up, still holding Light's waist. He placed him in his lap as he said, "Well, there could be many reasons why. I could've taken you to my home so you could rest up with someone watching over you so you wouldn't die by choking on your own bile. Or so I could then turn you into the police when you were sober enough to understand what was going on—after all, you are a mass murderer who is supposed to be dead. Or maybe I brought you here to save you from the life that I inferred you had. Maybe I wanted you all to myself. Maybe I wanted you to wake up in my arms, say 'Good morning' and peck me on the lips before we snuggled back into the covers." He had gotten a little carried away by the end, needing to say it out loud. Dammit, he needed to sit normally!

Light tensed in L's arms again (he had relaxed as he listened to him speak). If L wanted that…that meant that he loved him back! Without waiting to think, knowing if he did, he would regret his actions, he turned around in L's lap and planted a kiss on the older one's lips.

L was shocked, but understood Light's intentions: he wanted the last scenario L had stated to be real. He started leaning into the kiss, tightening his hold on Light's waist. Light wrapped his arms around L's neck, straddling him, and tried entering the other's mouth with his tongue. L wouldn't have it and instead shoved his own tongue into Light's eager opening. His tongue explored each and every crevice and tasted Light from the inside out. Somehow, he tasted better than cake.

However, Light was peeved that he was being dominated. He rarely allowed that, only when he was drunk did he let others overpower him, and that was because he was almost out of it anyway. He leaned forward, pushing L to the ground.

He disconnected their lips, earning a whimper from the older man, and started kissing down L's jaw to his neck, where he let his teeth nip the sensitive skin. L moaned underneath him and let one hand slide from Light's back to his hair, gripping it tightly.

Light kissed down L's collarbone and stopped once he got to the neckline of the black shirt. With a growl, he shoved it up over L's head and resumed devouring his love. Once he reached one of L's nipples, he sucked at it, biting it with his teeth and letting his tongue lick it lightly.

Underneath him, L moaned loudly and lifted his hips to grind into Light's growing arousal. This was heaven. He finally had the man he loved after almost a decade alone and he was about to lose his virginity. Yeah, he's 34 and hasn't lost his innocence; he was saving it for Light, but things got in the way… Anyway, now he was about to burst, but he couldn't handle being uke anymore. L needed dominance!

So the older man, starting to lose control through all the pleasure, pushed Light's head away from his own chest, sitting up in the process. He then grabbed the shocked man by the waist tightly and carried him over to the bed, dropping him at once. L hopped on the bed himself and crawled up Light's eager body. Light let him, for he knew this man had no idea what was going to happen soon enough. He had the strongest feeling L was a virgin still. Light, however, was a pro.

The tie around Light's neck came off in a flash of red and L dropped his head to Light's chest, pulling the buttons from the shirt with his teeth. Once all the buttons were broken off, he pulled the shirt open to reveal tanned, toned muscles. He placed a palm on either side of Light's chest, gasping as the muscles rippled beneath him. He looked up to see Light smirking, lust glazing his eyes.

Light's erection was growing harder by the second, to almost painful proportions. He tried to shimmy out of his pants—which were becoming increasingly tighter—with L still admiring his beauty from above him. This was L's turn to smirk. He released his hold on the younger man's chest and let his hands slide gracefully down to the pants. Slipping his thumbs inside, he pulled them down slowly, exposing Light's arousal creating a large tent. He moaned at the sight, unable to pull the boxers down and catch a glimpse of Light's manhood.

Light smirked once more at the ogling man. L just tugged the other man's boxers down in a hurry. At that moment, Light knew that the ex-detective would want to—no, _need_ to be seme; but he needed to be seme as well.

"Ah…ah…" they both exclaimed as Light pulled L back down, creating friction from the jeans L was still wearing. Light muffled his voice into L's neck once more, moaning as the man on top of him continued to grind. As long as L kept his pants on, no one was more dominant than the other. But that was about to change…

The fully naked man reached down, gliding down L's stomach, which was now not as skinny as nine years ago, but actually pretty toned, to his jeans. His hand started to undo the button and zipper, but another came to rest on top of his own. L had taken one of his hands from Light's shoulder and placed it over the other man's hand.

"No," he stated flatly, yet still panting out the word. "No, there is no way I am going to have intercourse with you, Light Yagami." He climbed off of the other man and proceeded to sit on the edge of the bed, back facing Light.

Light sat up, confused. How could they not have sex after all that was going on? He could still see the hunger in L's eyes as he refused. "Do you not trust me, L? Kira is gone. I will never try to kill you. So I thought I had killed you before; that doesn't mean anything now. I've had three years to think about you and what you are to me. And I've discovered something L." He crawled over to the other man, who hadn't even looked back yet.

"What, Light-kun?" L asked in his normal monotone voice.

Light took a deep breath and wrapped his arms around L from behind, straddling the man's back. "I am absolutely and positively in love with you." He pressed his lips to L's cheek and smooched him.

L sighed. So it was true; Light really did love him as he loved the other. Now that he was sure of Light's motives and his own, he could fully trust him. But that wasn't the reason why he had stopped Light from giving him the best thing that he could ever receive and/or give. "When was the last time Light-kun had intercourse?" he asked, still not turning around to face the man who had just confessed his love for him.

Light bugged out his eyes. Was L jealous? Was that it? Was he worried Light had someone else he could bang? Or was there some other reason behind the question? Light answered, "Don't worry, it was just a one night stand like the rest of 'em…Except this one." He scooted closer to L.

"You didn't answer my question, Light." L was starting to get annoyed. He knew they none of the other sex Light had had counted, for he truly loved him. In fact, Light had said as soon as he woke up that he loved someone else. He repeated, "When was the last time you had sex?"

Light gulped against L's throat. "Two nights ago…I've been hitting the bars a lot lately…You see, I was just laid off a couple weeks back and have been trying to find another job. It's hard and depressing, so I go out and drink. One thing leads to another and…yeah. You're lucky I wasn't drunker when you found me. Otherwise, you would've been stuck with a very drunk, very horny, very stupid guy to take care of!"

It was L's turn for his eyes to bug out. This was way too much information than he needed to know. But it was good to understand Light better. Now onto the reason why he wouldn't let Light's cock enter any part of his being. "When was the last time Light was tested?"

"For STI's?!" Light said, shocked, as he backed away from his soon-to-be lover. **(Author's note: for those of you who don't know, STI's are exactly the same thing as STD's, but the politically correct name. For in fact, they are not diseases, but infections.)** That was why L would have sex with him?! Because he was worried Light had gotten something from one of the many people he had slept with?! Well, now that he thought about it, it was a good idea to get tested.

"Yes, Light-kun, for sexually transmitted infections," L answered calmly, finally looking back at the stunned man. He could see the guilt in his eyes. "I'll get you some clothes and we will go to my doctor. I need you, Light, but I want to be sure I won't die early of AIDS or get some terrible rash. I'd rather not like to have to constantly scratch down there.

L stood and walked to a dresser, grabbing a normal white shirt—he sometimes wore them to reminisce—and another pair of jeans. After he threw them to Light, he walked to the master bath and stepped inside, closing the door and locking it. He then slid to the floor and undid his pants and pulled them down with his boxers.

His hands caressed his length, and he imagined, as he had done so many times before, that they were Light's skilled hands. He slowly dragged them up and down, letting a thumb play with his slit and spread the pre-cum to lubricate.

"Ngh…ah…ah…"

Light stared at the closed door for a few seconds before pulling his boxers back on and grabbing the clothes L had given him. He then snuck out of the bedroom and into the hall, needing to find another bathroom. He needed exactly what L was probably giving himself at that very moment. Down the hall, he found a small half bath and slipped inside.

The bathroom was still luxurious even if it was lacking a shower and bathtub. Light pushed his boxers down once more and sat himself on the floor. He wrapped his fingers around his member and imagined L's spidery fingers around him instead. Soon he was pumping himself harder and faster, head flung back, eyes half closed and glazed in intense lust, moaning and groaning loudly.

L was almost at his climax. With one final memory of Light's smirking, lust-filled face, he came into his waiting hands, shouting out his love's name. At that moment, Light came as well, shouting out a single letter of the alphabet. They could each hear each other in that moment as well, liking what they heard.


End file.
